The Man Behind His Text Message

“Ay, sup ma?” – He is too lazy to write/correctly pronounce a three letter word. Dump him.

“You look so good today.” – Good? GOOD? I woke up this morning, slabbed on some lipstick, fixed my fucked up morning hair and put on something nice for a “good”? Dump him.

“What’s up?” – Hmm… let me see. I see the sky, the ceiling, some pretty lights too. I also see some dark spots from the leak upstairs. Is that a bird or a plane? Dump him.

“Look up in the sky, girl. I think heaven is missing an angel. But look.. I found her.” *points to you* – If “girl” isn’t your real name, dump him. He obviously found this pick up line on Google. So not creative. Dump him.

“Hey” – It’s “Hello.” Dump him.

“What are you wearing?” – The fact he’s leaving a vision of you in sexy panties and a lace bra restricted to a text and his imagination is reason enough to dump him.

“When can you come over?” A.K.A when can we fuuuuuuck? Never. Also, observe that you are doing the coming over and he is not picking you up. Dump him.

Lesson learned: There are over 30,000 words in the Oxford Dictionary. If a man can’t articulate these words in a creative manner, he’s not worth it. Find someone you can challenge and always be challenged by. If you can’t find someone, buy a mirror and fall in love with yourself. *the “Clarissa Explains It All” segment of my blurb*

Music Choice: “Madness” by Zee Avi. I fell in love with this song then I fell more in love with the album. You can say I’m cheating on this song with the album.

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